Dear Diary,

March 14, 1994: Today I got my hair cut shoulder length. The barber was Jane, she was nice. Oh, I also got this diary today.

Yesterday while cleaning out the attic I found my very first diary. For the majority of the entries I was in the fifth grade at a brand new school and, including pre-school, it was the fifth school I attended. I guess you could technically say it's the sixth, but my mom's venture into homeschooling me the first half of second grade probably doesn't count. I was a bit, um, strong-willed and stubborn (shocking, I know). My poor mother!

As I held the small book with the padded cover, I felt just like I was 10 years old again. I pushed open the clasp and my initial thought was, "wow, I'm glad it's unlocked". It's funny that after so many years, a girl's first instinct is to have her diary under lock and key, and maybe even a mattress! My sister learned that the hard way.

May 24, 1997: I just read my sister's diary. It's stupid. There's nothing about guys in it. 

My favorite part of the diary was my entries about my first 'boyfriend', Josh.  We were in sixth grade. He 'asked me out' at a skating party and it lasted almost two months! What a relationship! I found out later that his mom was so upset he had a 'girlfriend' that she asked the school to ban couples skates at those skating parties, and they did. So I'd like to make a public apology to all the girls who came after me who just wanted to skate to one song holding hands with their crush! :)

October 24, 1996: We just had our skating party. Josh asked me out and my friend said, "Yes she will" because I couldn't talk. It was 7:40. Then we skated to "Place in this World" by Michael W. Smith. I wanted the night to last forever.

The details of our 'relationship' were fun to read, but the best part of my entire diary (looking back of course) was the break up!

December 2, 1996: Today was a bad day. Josh gave me a letter that said: 

To Kayla, Let's just be Friends Causes when we started going out we could never talk to each other. OK? In Christ, Josh

That was at 1:15. I felt better the rest of the day. I agree with the letter, but he put "causes" when it's supposed to be "cause".  

Even in my disappointment of being dumped, I was editing for grammar and spelling! I was obviously born to be an English teacher. Other aspects of who I am have also endured. As I was reading diary entries to Mark, he would say something like, "it sounds so much like you, you haven't changed a bit".

1. I was always a saver:

May 29, 1994: I need $100 for a bike. The bike I want is at Target. It's a 10-speed. I have $4.03 now and mom owes me $28. I'll tell you if I get it. 

July 17, 1994: I'm so close to $100. I have $71.90. I'll have it before school starts.

FYI: My dad told me I had to wait until I was 10 to buy a 10-speed, so I ended up getting one for my birthday and hid my money away.

2. My mom's work ethic was passed on to me- it's in my DNA.

December 1, 1996: I am still sick and this is the week of all the programs I have to sing in. I messed up BAD in practice today so I have to spend the rest of the night working on my song. I have to be ready. 

In case you're wondering: December 6, 1996: The Christmas Program was Awesome!

3. I always tried to put on a strong front even if I really felt otherwise:

August 15, 1995: Tomorrow I'm getting two cavities filled. I'm kinda scared. Shh...don't tell anyone.

4. I bleed Red...always have, always will:

November 16, 1996: Today I got new boots and red and white fingernail polish because today is the Huskers vs. Iowa State game!

November 29, 1996: Nebraska 17 to Colorado 12 

(This was obviously important enough to include in my diary! I actually still have the ticket stub from my favorite trip to Memorial Stadium- November 1, 1997- Nebraska vs. Oklahoma. Coach Tom Osborne's 250th win!)

My personality, work ethic, and favorite things are the same. Luckily, at least one thing has changed.

I've only included a small portion of the 'fun' parts of my diary. A girl has to keep some things to herself. But, as I've been processing all that I wrote, I see how small and simple the word love was to my fifth and sixth grade understanding. I used that word so many times in my diary, mostly for the superficial butterflies you get as a pre-teen girl with a crush. I see how shallow my understanding was and it makes me thankful for all that I know now.  Now I can say things like, I love my God...I love my husband...I love my family and friends...I love my students and the ministry I get to be part of... It's nice to be on the outside of adolescence looking back in again.

But love, I've come to understand, is more than three words mumbled before bedtime. Love is sustained by action, a pattern of devotion in the things we do for each other every day.
- Nicholas Sparks

Good night diary, 

Kayla

Adopted Grandparents

At about the same time everyday in our neighborhood, the dogs begin their chorus of barking, tails wagging, and mouths salivating because they've just heard the sound they live for. Smack! The sound of our neighbor's screen door closing. Our neighbor, Ed, is the all-around caretaker for every dog in the neighborhood (or at least in the 4 block radius where he walks everyday). He knows all their names, knows who likes to be scratched behind the ears, and has a pocket-full of treats on him at all times.


Our dog Charlie is convinced he's the favorite. And secretly he probably is, though Ed would never admit to playing favorites with 'his' dogs. Charlie gets the first treat on Ed's walk and then eagerly sits outside by the fence until Ed returns to give him another. When someone finds a dog that has escaped, we all call Ed to describe the dog and ask which house it belongs to. Ed knows everytime, of course and says, "Oh that's Molly, she lives at the second house from the corner, just say 'Molly, go home' and she'll go back on her own."


Not only is he a dog-whisperer, but he can fix and do about anything. He's the Ed of all trades! He has every tool we'd ever need and knows how to MacGyver any strange house project we ask about. He knows the history of every home on our block because he's lived in his house since the early 70's, when he retired. Every day in the summer, we meet by the fence and talk about the past. He was born in Boston and has the thick accent to prove it. We know he was once in the Navy because he has the worn tattoos on his arm. He drove a truck for many years, and retired to St. Louis because his daughter lives here. His wife, Jean, comes out to the fence too from time-to-time and visits with Charlie, but can't get around well due to her health.


They are the epitome of the cute old couple. Every Saturday night they do date night at Old Country Buffet. At about 4:30, he starts up the car, then goes inside and brings Jean out on his arm, helps her down the stairs and into the car. There is a lot we can learn from their marriage.


I love all of these things about Ed and Jean, but my favorite part of our friendship has to be the coupons. Shortly after we moved in three years ago, I mentioned in passing that I had used a coupon at a fast food restaurant for lunch. Well, since that day, Ed and Jean have been coupon hunters for us. Each week when the paper comes, they gather all of their restaurant coupons for places like Arby's, Steak and Shake, and KFC to give to us. They wrap them up in a grocery bag (in case it rains) and tie them to our fence for us to pick up when we get home. This has been a tradition for three years. Now, we've never had the heart to tell them that we could never use all those coupons, and we don't eat enough fast food to make it worth their while. So, whenever we see them, we thank them for the coupons and use them when we can and wait for the next batch on the fence.


Now, since Mark's graduation is looming and we're probably moving out of this house sometime this summer, it makes us sad to think about not living next to Ed and Jean. However, we know that our relationship won't end even if we move. We have become like family, just like the neighbors who lived here before us did. They talk at least once a month. I'm sure that will be the case with us as well. And of course we'll have to bring Charlie by since he will go through Ed withdrawals when we move. Come to think of it, we'll have to start buying Charlie treats for the first time in years.


I guess I wrote this post more to log some of our memories with Ed before we have to move, and I would love to add a picture, but I've realized that we've never taken a picture of Ed. So, that is now my goal, to get one before we go, maybe of Ed and Charlie. Only then will this blog post be complete.

My Homeless Friends

I have always had a homeless friend.

When I was in grade school a homeless man lived in the park across the street from the school who would often walk by at recess time. He would never say anything, but we'd see him hanging out just down the street, far enough away that our teachers wouldn't get nervous. One day, my friend and I smuggled some of our lunch out to recess and ran over to the corner of our concrete-and-weeds playground, and stuck the food treasures through the chain link fence. That is when God first opened my eyes to the homeless around me.

Then, as I got older, I got my first job at the Orange Julius in the Mall Food Court. I would drive through the same entrance to the Mall everyday and that is where God planted the next homeless man I would meet. His name was Homeless Joe and he was well-known in the Mall Employee community. Everyday he would stand on the same median with his 'Homeless and Hungry' sign. The first day I noticed him I kept driving. I had worked all day, it was a Saturday, and I was tired and I kept driving. Every block I drove I felt more and more strongly that I should give him something. So, after 6 blocks of wrestling with God, I u-turned back to the mall. I went right back to Orange Julius, got a chili cheese dog and a giant glass of water and went back to my car. I drove through the same drive, pulled in next to the median, and offered Homeless Joe a hot dog. You would've thought it was a gourmet meal (don't let their advertising fool you, OJ/Dairy Queen dogs are not gourmet!). With a smile on his face he said, "God bless you dear." This began my three year friendship with Homeless Joe based on a chili dog.

That brings me to my current homeless friend. He is always dressed in camouflage head to toe, with a rainbow scarf, a jester's hat, and a giant duffle bag. The first time I 'met' this man, I was in my car, radio up, windows down and I heard a whistle and jibberish being yelled in my direction. At first I thought he was being rude, but after several 'meetings' I realized he was being an entertainer. He was yelling fun jibberish for all to hear. I smiled, then laughed and kept driving.

Today, as I drove home from the school, I passed my homeless friend. He was playing a trombone...he may have made up a new key no one has heard before. It was bad, but when he stopped I saw the biggest smile spread across his face. His joy even in obviously difficult times is contagious. Again, I smiled, laughed, and kept driving. I've often thought I should offer him something, but he never asks for food or money. He holds no sign or can of coins. He seems to truly enjoy entertaining.

As part of my teaching ministry, I get to organize major servant event days for the whole school. This year I've chosen to focus on serving the poor. I pray that my students get to see the unique relationships and the joy in friendship that they will experience when helping those affected by homelessness. My homeless friends have been a part of my story, and God has used each of them to teach me something new.

I pray that God always gives me opportunities to befriend the homeless.

Ctrl+Alt+Delete

I have to admit that I'm a technology lover. While some may be avid instruction readers, I prefer to make that my last resort. I'd much rather discover the intricacies of technology than have a step-by-step tutorial showing me how it's 'supposed' to work. I enjoy trial and error. I start clicking buttons and see where I end up. Now, one would think that as an organized, rule-follower (for the most part), who loves to read I would snatch up the instructions and read them cover to cover. Not so, my friend. I want to live on the edge, toss out the playbook (not literally- it will get neatly filed behind the proper tab in my "Manuals" binder), and explore new territory. I am the Lewis and Clark of technology.

This week for my birthday I was ecstatic to receive a Kindle (from my in-laws) and a label maker (from my dear friend at work). Both perfect gifts for me and both new technology. So of course, as soon as I get the Kindle, I turn it on and immediately begin clicking buttons and finding free books. And, seconds after installing the batteries, I created my first label that said, 'It works!' and gave it to the friend who so kindly blessed me with that gift! My next adventure will be discovering how to add borders to the labels!

This love for technology has also given me opportunities to serve others. But, I always have to laugh when helping someone with a computer problem, because the one phrase I hear most is, "I was afraid I'd mess something up." I have to say, I don't think I've ever uttered those words. I come from a Ctrl+Alt+Delete generation. I am all for trying something new and if it doesn't work, reset and fix the problems. It seems that people often do the same things year in and year out just because "it's what we've always done". I hope that I never get to that point. Even in my classroom, I teach the same books, but every year looks a bit different. I add to, subtract from, and sometimes completely scrap what I've done in the past. Change keeps me on my toes. It keeps me alert and prevents me from living on auto-pilot. I don't want to coast through life. I want to take risks and have adventures. I want to live as if Ctrl+Alt+Delete is not just a computer option, but an option in life, too. If something doesn't work, don't stress, reset. What would you try if you could just Ctrl+Alt+Delete if it didn't work out?

My Blog Title

When I decided to finally create my own blog, it took a long time to decide what title I wanted to give it. I thought about some ideas that have to do with teaching, maybe even an allusion to Shakespeare, but didn't like anything I came up with. Picking a title is harder than I thought it would be!

Have you ever been part of an ice-breaker activity where everyone had to name an object that describes them? Well, that is how I chose my blog name. I am a to-do list.

As long as I've been able to write, I've created to-do lists. I think it comes from my very organized and efficient mother. On Saturdays, I used to see her write her list for the day on the back of a white envelope that came in the mail that day. Then, as the day progressed, I would see each item get crossed out and, even though it wasn't my own list that was dwindling, I felt excitement as each item got the neat black line.

That is how my list-making began. Now, my first to-do lists weren't anything spectacular. They usually included: get up, get dressed, eat breakfast...things like that. And yes, I really did include "get up" as an entry on my to-do lists. As I got older, the lists got longer and the items more significant, but at the core was my enthusiasm to cross out each item. Some people ride roller coasters, others jump out of airplanes, I draw straight lines through list entries for my adrenaline rush. For me, there is no feeling like a list with everything completed. It gives me a feeling of accomplishment. Strange, I know!

All that being said, this is my favorite part of who I am, the part I got from my mom. An organized, efficient, goal-oriented person who uses these qualities to serve other people. Thus the name of my blog, which I hope will include the big and little things on my life's to-do list.

Organization, My Favorite Hobby

I love organizing. I know most people cringe when I say that, but I can get lost in the possibilities of the storage section in any store. Any time I wander off, Mark knows right where to find me. (Think Monica from Friends, although I don't own a label maker, but would love one!)
Over the years, I've learned that when my house is organized I feel like my life is organized and I'm just happier. Somehow my emotional state is connected to my level of organization.
That being said my house has been cluttered for months (and my level of stress has been pretty high, no surprise). Now, I don't want you to think of my house like an episode of Hoarders or Clean House. I could never let it get to that point, but we've had piles of papers waiting to be filed and laundry I keep trying to fold and never get to. So I decided to tackle the paper mountain first.


I wanted to turn an empty wall in our kitchen into our paper and life organization center. I saw this one from Pottery Barn, but I am way too frugal to spend that kind of cash on something I knew we could make!


So, step one was to determine the pieces we wanted:
- calendar
- at least two mail trays (one for new mail, one for things to be filed)
- phone charger stations
- key hooks
- a functional shelf
- peg boards for menus and invitations, etc.


Then we started creating...I had a cheap magnetic calendar on this wall before, so after adding some nice white trim($2) that went back up.

We also had 12'x12' peg board sheets so we again added trim to them ($2) and used ribbon to give another a French memory board feel (under $1). We had an extra white decorative shelf from a set we bought for our bathroom, so that went up as well. (probably under $5)

The major project, however, was the mail/phone charger station. I knew exactly what I wanted and couldn't find one anywhere, so we decided to make one on our own. For several weekends, Mark worked to build me the cabinet exactly like I wanted it and then I put coat after coat of pure white lacquer so it would look clean and simple. (This whole cabinet was less than $30!)

The final step was to add some decorative touches and labels of course! I made the Mail and File labels using some scraps from some scrapbooking paper I had left over. I also had some cute ornaments we'd received this year, which I made into a monogram.

So, for under $50 we were able to make an organization system that perfectly met our needs and fed into my OCD tendencies!

For organizing tips and tricks, check out my favorite organizer's website: RealSimple.com

Satisfied?

On Sunday, Pastor Tony was preaching on Jesus meeting the Samaritan woman at the well (John 4:1-42) and about being Satisfied. As Americans, it's really hard to be satisfied with anything, because there's always a bigger and better out there. But, what really struck me during his sermon was about the service that was taking place. Since serving others is my calling and, interestingly enough right now, my job description (Leadership & Service Coordinator), I was interested in the ways Jesus was serving this woman. So, here's a few thoughts...

Jesus went to the need. Where do you find those who are thirsty? At a well, of course. So Jesus (offering living water which satisfies instead of temporary physical water), goes to a well to find someone who is thirsty. He met the woman where she was, and he met the need even she didn't know she had. I love the idea of serving others where they are. So many times in church we think we need to bring people to us (or worse that people will just come to us), but Jesus knew that wasn't how things work. He went to them, he took the Word (himself) to them, and met their needs.

In this story, there are three types of people.
1) The woman. She's needy, but doesn't know it. She's a Samaritan (outcast or lower class). She's a woman (even further outcast or lower class). And she's had 5 husbands and is in an adulterous relationship. So, by my count, this woman has five strikes against her. Are we the Samaritan woman who can't see our own need for a Savior because we're too busy with our lives?

2) The disciples. They were off looking for food when Jesus started talking to this woman. They were very worried about the details. They even said, "Rabbi, eat something". It sounds like care and concern for Jesus' well-being, but He responds, "I have food to eat that you know nothing about." Are we too worried about the details of serving others when our focus should be on the living water?

3) Jesus. He was worried about the woman. He wasn't worried about eating or about his reputation. As a Jew, being seen with a Samaritan is bad enough, but a woman, who is an adulterer is a reputation that Jesus couldn't ever shake. And he didn't...even today he still has that reputation. We talk about Jesus hanging out with sinners, and she appears to be one of the first. So, his reputation was built on this encounter and many more like it. Are we too worried about associating with people that 'Christians shouldn't associate with'? But, on the other hand, isn't having a reputation of being like Jesus what we strive for?

One part of this story that I love is that Jesus attends to the spiritual through the physical. He started a conversation about water (physical) and used that to lead into the vital conversation about living water (spiritual). Because he saw the need, which created opportunity, the woman believed. Not only did she believe, but her town believed because of her testimony about Jesus. In the end, I think I'd like to be the mix of all three people in this story. Jesus whose heart saw the need and attended to it. The disciples whose hands showed care and concern. And the woman, whose voice told the testimony of her Lord and brought many to the feet of Jesus.